Post Abortion Counselling

Many women (and men) who have had experience of abortion can find themselves struggling to cope in the aftermath of this distressing life event.
Given the extensive media coverage concerning the tragic case of Ms SavitaHalappanavar, you may find yourself being bombarded by unwanted memories, feelings or thoughts that you are struggling to deal with and whether your experience was recent or many years ago, counselling may help you deal with these emotions now.
The secrecy and privacy surrounding abortion means that, for many, post abortive counselling is a support that is not often sought or even considered. This can lead to further compounding feelings of isolation and loneliness.  Often there is an expectation that life will just continue on as normal and when this is not the case, we can be left with a sense of confusion, sadness or anger.
Often the mix of emotions is confusing and disconcerting. Relief, guilt shame and secrecy in equal measures are hard emotions to reconcile. Even something as basic a follow up medical care is often neglected due to embarrassment, or shame certainly do not aid the recovery process either emotionally or physically.
The decision to have an abortion, whether it was with your partner or on your own, can be a harrowing experience mentally and physically, so aftercare should not be ignored.
Parents and partners, in particular, often find they have no voice and no one to turn to and feel as if they are not entitled to the emotions they are experiencing, adding to their sense of loneliness and confusion. The high feelings that surround abortion often leave family members feeling betrayed and angry. This can further ad to the confusion and whirlwind of emotions that can be experienced following abortions. Post abortive care can help with working though the minefield of feelings surrounding the experience. Talking about the decision to have an abortion the impact this has had on your life and the resulting emotions may help you work thought any conflict you are experiencing.
So much has been said, read and written about abortion that it can often seem like we are joining a conversation mid-way through any time the topic is brought up. Counselling and therapy starts back at the very beginning, talking about your journey, your experience and your emotions.
The Post Abortive Counselling I offer is open to men and women, individually or as a couple, as well as parents, siblings and friends and is completely without judgement.
If you would like to talk, feel free to call me for an appointment on 087 709 74 77 or email me in confidence at midwestcounselling@gmail.com.


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Eating Disorders Part I

Every day millions of people live with eating disorders. Men and women, young and old, eating disorders are indiscriminate when it comes to ethnicity or economic demographic. However adolescent women are make up the largest portion of suffers of eating disorders. Year on year this is one group where the numbers remain proportionally higher.

The equation that thin in beautiful had typically been the domain of emaciated Hollywood starlets but it is the frightening rise in popularity of reality TV modelling shows that must carry their own portion of responsibility today. The ratings for these shows are frighteningly high, especially given how barbaric they are in their treatment of vulnerable young girls.

In one show(Americas Next Top Model, Cycle 12) the appalling line “What have you been eating?” was directed at a contestant ( London Levi-Nance, 18 yrs. old) who had openly admitted she had suffered an eating disorder in the past, it really seems the height of irresponsibility to posit such a pointed question at a young woman inthis position. There is no way to misinterpret the derogatory tone of the questionand the young lady’s guilt laden defensive response and subsequent tears leaves no doubt as to the impact this callous and witheringsneer had on her.

Given the proliferation of eating disorder, up to 2000, 00 in Ireland (Source; Independent.ie) it is imperative that we all inform ourselves as to the nature and danger of eating disorders. Our daughters, sisters, friends and neighbours are squarely in the cross hairs and it behoves each one of us to ensure we are equipped with the information to help them manoeuvre this passage of life armed with the support and knowledge that will safely guide them through.

To beginhere are three main types of eating disorders:

•           Anorexia

•           Bulimia

•           Binge purge Eating cycles

Anorexia or anorexia nervosa is the name given to starving yourself because you believe you are overweight. People who suffer from this disorder are convinced they are overweight and highly restrict their food intake. It does not mean a loss of appetite or interest in food, but it does mean reducing and restricting your food intake to that point of starvation. People who are up to 15% under the medically agreed healthy weight for their height and body type and are dieting by refusing foods may be suffering from this disorder.

Bulimia or bulimia nervosa is characterised by cycles of binging, that is, excessive eating, and then purging yourself of the food by inducing vomiting, taking laxatives or enemas and sometimes by exercising obsessively. The process of ridding your body of the calories eaten is called "purging."

Those who suffer from Bulimia may repeat the binge purge cycle many times a day. In contradiction to anorexia, sometimes people who have bulimia can go undiagnosed for a much longer period of time. Oftentimes with bulimia, there is no dramatically obvious weight loss and so the condition remains unnoticed by those close to the sufferer. Because the cycle of binge and purge comes with a great deal of shame attached and can take place over such a long period of time,there can often be a compounding of many of the initial psychological issues that contributed to the bulimia in the first place and great deal of work may need to be done to uncover the core issues at heart. Of the two, bulimia is now the most common eating disorder. It is estimated that 2% of Irish adolescent girls may be suffering from bulimia at any given time. (Source, bodywhys.ie)

A point that needs to be made known and that we need to be reminded of is that eating disorders are a potentially life threatening mental illness.  They are not a lifestyle choice, a fad or diet gone wrong.  We can characterise an eating disorder by looking beyond the average diet to the point that unhealthy preoccupation with eating, dieting, exercise and a distorted sense of body image have taken on significant ramification in a person’s life.

Beyond the two outlined here, there are a large variety of eating disorders, with various different characteristics and causes that can affect a person at any given time. A common theme eating disorders however can be low self-esteem and the eating disorder is an attempt by the person to try and deal with deep rooted psychological issues by engaging with an unhealthy relationship with food.

Again it is so very important to debunk the fairly common misconception that eating disordersare a fad, a choice, or an attempt at attention-seeking. These kinds of misconceptions and judgements serve only to detract from their seriousness of the disorder and blame and further criticism on an already suffering individual. Eating disorders are serious, and potentially fatal, mental illnesses which require intensive psychological and physical intervention. It is common for a person to evolve from one eating disorder to another, and somebody with anorexia may progress into bulimia and or a different binge eating disorder, and vice versa.

Without the correct medical diagnosis and care as well the correct counselling and therapeutic support medical complications including life threatening organ failure is possible.

It is important to remember that person with an eating disorder should not be blamed for having it! Eating disorders are usually the result of a long standing series of complex interactions between social, biological and psychological factors which bring about theses harmful behaviours.

In conjunction with medical care, treatment of eating disorders nearly always includes cognitive-behavioural therapy or psychotherapy like what we offer at Midwest Counselling and Psychotherapy. Sometimes medication may also be needed and in severe cases a cross functional team may need to work hand in hand including hospitalisation combined with psychotherapy. There is some conform to be taken in that knowledge that eating disorders are treatable and often cured within a few months' time, so it is important that we continue to watch out for symptoms among our friend and acquaintances and in particular among young women.

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Post Abortion Counselling

Many women (and men) who have had experience of abortion can find themselves struggling to cope in the aftermath of this distressing life event.

Given the extensive media coverage concerning the tragic case of Ms SavitaHalappanavar, you may find yourself being bombarded by unwanted memories, feelings or thoughts that you are struggling to deal with and whether your experience was recent or many years ago, counselling may help you deal with these emotions now.

The secrecy and privacy surrounding abortion means that, for many, post abortive counselling is a support that is not often sought or even considered. This can lead to further compounding feelings of isolation and loneliness.  Often there is an expectation that life will just continue on as normal and when this is not the case, we can be left with a sense of confusion, sadness or anger.

Often the mix of emotions is confusing and disconcerting. Relief, guilt shame and secrecy in equal measures are hard emotions to reconcile. Even something as basic a follow up medical care is often neglected due to embarrassment, or shame certainly do not aid the recovery process either emotionally or physically.
The decision to have an abortion, whether it was with your partner or on your own, can be a harrowing experience mentally and physically, so aftercare should not be ignored.

Parents and partners, in particular, often find they have no voice and no one to turn to and feel as if they are not entitled to the emotions they are experiencing, adding to their sense of loneliness and confusion. The high feelings that surround abortion often leave family members feeling betrayed and angry. This can further ad to the confusion and whirlwind of emotions that can be experienced following abortions. Post abortive care can help with working though the minefield of feelings surrounding the experience. Talking about the decision to have an abortion the impact this has had on your life and the resulting emotions may help you work thought any conflict you are experiencing. 

So much has been said, read and written about abortion that it can often seem like we are joining a conversation mid-way through any time the topic is brought up. Counselling and therapy starts back at the very beginning, talking about your journey, your experience and your emotions
.
The Post Abortive Counselling I offer is open to men and women, individually or as a couple, as well as parents, siblings and friends and is completely without judgement.


If you would like to talk, feel free to call me for an appointment on 087 709 74 77 or email me in confidence at midwestcounselling@gmail.com.


Explore more about   Counselling Limerick